Ask Rainbow's Dad
Hi , I know your not my father in this universe , but I need some advice about boys...

Boys…  Boys boys boys…  Hhhmmmmm….

Here’s a few things you need to know about boys, Scoots.  Boys are stupid.  They are especially stupid when they are teenagers.  They are extremely stupid when they think they are right about anything.  They are undoubtedly stupid when they hit puberty.  And they are unbelievably stupid when its comes to girls.

The best advice I’ll give is to put boys at a safe distance.  You can be friends with them but don’t try to be anymore than that because things will only get crazy.  But if you insist on having a relationship with a boy, always have a backup plan when things go south and friends that’ll pick you right back up when you’re down.  If you have a friend whose dating a boy, always be there for them.  The worst thing you can ever do is ignore your friends while in a relationship.  The worst.

Yo, RD's dad? Did you have a heart attack or something? Where'd you go?
Anonymous

I’m alive.  The art monkey is currently going through a terrible art block.  The kind that makes you feel terrible for not drawing stuff like you should.  And that only gets worse the more you put off doing blog stuff.  Which you can clearly see.

All he needs to get smacked with the right kind of inspiration and he’ll feel up to the task again.  But who knows when that’ll happen?  He keeps saying he’ll get things done then ends up flopping under his own pressure…  It is aggrovating…

P-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-p-ponies!
Anonymous

Yes.  I am one.  And now I’m going to get out of my lazy funk to answer some questions.  Because it is long over due.

Dedicated to the poor choices I have made.  (See what I did there?)  This would have made a much better April’s Fools gag.  Though it lacks Nicolas Cage…  But this is much cooler.  21% cooler.  Because I like to go one step beyond.  Can’t get more original than that.

BAM!  Credit Time!
Special Thanks to Applelina for the 3D model.
Cloudsdale background made by Zvn
Zap Apple vector made by Skeptic Mousey

Hi there.  It’s been awhile.  Sorry for the unannounced hiatus…. AGAIN.  Golly gosh do I suck apple seeds!  Which is why I have come to a decision.  I am quitting Rainbow Dad.  That’s right.  I have to accept that I am a mediocre artist who is terrible at keeping up schedules and will never improve because of it.  So I am going to just stop.  I’ll leave this thing up for future generations or something.  Though WHY they would want to look at this fail blog is beyond me!

But don’t threat!  This does not mean that I’ll leave the fandom!  In fact, I am going to start a new blog dedicated to ponies and one special man.  Nicolas Cage.  That’s right.  I discovered that my one true passion in life is to take pictures of transparent images that are on top of faded images of Nick Cage that can be found on Derpibooru.  I can’t believe I wasted my time on some dorky dad or some fat little colt who everyone calls a teacher’s pet.  THIS IS ART!

So I hope you all like this little preview of what’s to come in the near future!  And don’t expect anything else from this blog this week!  Because it is all about Nicky now.

Just watched the EW preview and… yeah.  I’m going to go and border up Rainbow Dash inside her house.  The outside world is too dangerous for my little girl man!  I will need to protect her from all these weirdos and wackjobs and the hordes of CRAZY SCARY MONSTERS!

First people are trying to shove that Soarin guy in my face and now this!  It isn’t easy being a dad…

Well too bad Rainbow Dad, I already used magic sealed piercing on her. she asked for one on her tong, one on her eyebrow and lip and two for each ears... they can't be removed dude...

Brought to you by my lack of originality

Hey Rainbow Dad dude... What would you say id Rainbow Dash get piercings?

This is a very good question.  Have you ever seen an athlete wear their piercings or jewelry while they are out in the field?  That should be a no because those things really do get in the way with your performance.  Since Dashie really wants to join the Wonderbolts,  So if she does get them, she’ll have to remove them anyway in order to do any physical activities.  I highly encourage that she just get ear piercings in that case because those are easier to remove and leave less visible scarring.  Other facial piercings are fine as long as she remembers to remove them all before doing a performance.

However, tongue piercings is a big NO-NO!  Those things can be dangerous!  I had a friend back in High School who had one in his mouth.  We played a game of tackle hoofball once and when I tackled the guy he bit his tongue.  The stud was made of metal and it chipped his teeth bad.  His parents were P to the I to the double S’d off!  He had to get it removed and had to get a lot of dental work done.

And that’s why I don’t have piercings myself.  I can’t afford to damage this pretty face of mine.  Pony society can’t function without my good looks.

Grandchildren. You know that will only capitalize the valid point of how old you've become.

Well, I think that this capitalizes the valid point of how you should shut the buck up!  :D

News:  I have recovered from my hospitalization and the stitching is starting to really heal up.  I have been able to walk around these past few days and can finally stop using the stool softener.  So yeah.  Feeling awesome.  So thanks again to everybody who sent in their concerns for me.  It is much appreciated.  And remember kids.  Prune juice is your friend.

Wanna hear something scary? *whispers* grandchildren

Whaaaaat?  I would frick’n love having grandkids!  I would frick’n kill for grandkids.  I mean it.  So you better watch your back Tornado Blitz from down the lane.  Let your bird poop on my lawn every morning would ya…  Anyway!  Kids are great!  I can spoil the little tykes rotten and hang out and it’ll be like reliving Dashie’s fillyhood all over again!

But no… The real scary part is how those grandchildren are made…